summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
