This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
