nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
