Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
