Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
