just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
