found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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