You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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