i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
