Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
