my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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