He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
