Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
