I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
