"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
