the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
