I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize