Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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