Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
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