I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
