I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
