I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
