Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
