I'm really into asian looking animals
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I have aggressive nipples.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
