you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
the day after is always just damage control
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
