In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
