Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
