..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
