new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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