We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
