i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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