the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
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