That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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