What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
