Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
