I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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