Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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