she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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