Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
