i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
be right there i have to get my cape
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
