Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
