She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize