i think i have herpe
just one?
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
