cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
