you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
