Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize