nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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