He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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