Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
