Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
