Sponge bath it is.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
should my penis look like a turkey
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
