Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
